REAL CHIEFS Don't have any civilian clothes.
REAL CHIEFS Have CPO Association Cards from their last 5 commands.
REAL CHIEFS Don't remember any time they weren't Chief's.
REAL CHIEFS Propose like this "There will be a wedding at 1000 hours on 29 October, be there in whites with your gear packed because you will be a prime participant."
REAL CHIEFS Favorite national holiday is CPO Initiation.
REAL CHIEFS Keeps four sets of dress khaki uniforms in the closet in hopes they will come back.
REAL CHIEFS Favorite food is shipboard SOS for breakfast.
REAL CHIEFS Don't know how to tell civilian time.
REAL CHIEFS Call each other "Chief."
REAL CHIEFS Greatest fear is signing for property book items.
REAL CHIEFS Dream in Navy Blue, White, Haze Gray and occasionally khaki.
REAL CHIEFS Have served on ships that are now war memorials or tourist attractions.
REAL CHIEFS Get tears in their eyes when the "Chief" dies in the movie "Operation Pacific."
REAL CHIEFS Don't like Certified Navy Twill. "Wash Khaki" is the ONLY thing to make a uniform out of.
REAL CHIEFS Can find their way to the CPO Club blindfolded, on 15 different Navy Bases.
REAL CHIEFS Have pictures of ships in their wallets.
REAL CHIEFS Don't own any pens that do not have "Property U.S. Govt" on them.
REAL CHIEFS Don't voluntarily get the mandatory flu shots.
REAL CHIEFS Don't order supplies, they swap for them.
REAL CHIEFS Favorite quote is from the movie Ben Hur, "We keep you alive to serve this ship."
REAL CHIEFS Think excessive modesty is their only fault.
REAL CHIEFS Hate to write evaluations, except for their own.
REAL CHIEFS Turn in a 4 page brag sheet for their evaluation.
REAL CHIEFS Last ship was always better.
REAL CHIEFS Know that the black tar in their coffee cup makes the coffee taste better.
REAL CHIEFS Idea of heaven-Three good PO1's and a Division Officer who does what he is told.
REAL CHIEFS Think John Wayne would have made a good Chief, if he had not gone soft and made Marine movies.
REAL CHIEFS Use the term "Good Training" to describe any unpleasant task...Scraping the sides of the ship is "Good Training." Having to sleep on your seabag in the parking lot because there was no room in the barracks is "Good Training."
REAL CHIEFS have no sense of humor...
REAL CHIEFS have butt buffed barstools in places no civilized human being has ever heard about...
REAL CHIEFS would drink stuff out of the wing tanks of an F-14...
REAL CHIEFS actually were in the Old Navy....
REAL CHIEFS have coffee grounds in their livers....
REAL CHIEFS must dine regularly on E-3 butts or die of malnutrition...
REAL CHIEFS should have their mouth’s washed out with soap ever twenty minutes...
REAL CHIEFS smoke but never buy their own cigarettes.....
REAL CHIEFS are always remembering the "good ole days"...
REAL CHIEFS travel in herds...Three or more E-7s or better, make up a Chief herd...unlike the Great American Buffalo...there will always be Chief herds.)
REAL CHIEFS remember when it was legal to grind up nonrated, non-qualified men and use the resulting grease to lubricate the snorkel mast.
South American Banana Republic dictators don't hold half the power of a REAL CHIEF.
When a REAL CHIEF dies they remove his tongue and send it to a bullwhip factory.
When a REAL CHIEF is pissed off the reasonable radius of safety starts THREE zip codes from where he is standing.
Text & Graphic
by Robert "Dex" Armstrong. TMSN
U.S.S. Requin (SS-481)